No More Hiding, No More Shame

Many of you know my story and are probably curious about the latest scoop on the ex-pastor and the ex-pastor's wife. We are human afterall, and desire to know the juicy details of a such a scandal. I'll give the nutshell version.

Almost two years ago, I discovered my husband (who was a pastor) was having an affair. I exposed the affair, he resigned, we separated for six months, tried to reconcile and eventually divorced. We share 50/50 custody of our children and have an amicable relationship. We have exchanged forgiveness and are both on a path of healing.

I'm sure I have left you with a thousand questions and you're dying to know more, but you won't get it. Why? Because I'm tired of living in that identity. Instead, I would really like to be known for much more than the scorned woman who lost her life in a matter of 12 hours.

I am still very much on a journey to discover my identity. I'm not bitter, I have no regrets and I'm taking it one day at a time. I am strong, independent and capable. I cry alot, but I also laugh. I love life, even though the fairytale turned into a nightmare. I am optimistic and believe there is more.

I've been in hiding for over a year. Why? Because I've struggled with deep shame. Most do not know what to do with women like me. One day you're a wife, mother, and pastor's wife. The next you're "that pastor's wife whose husband cheated." People avoided me and I avoided them. I couldn't bear the looks of pity or the "how are you" questions anymore. (For the record, I hate that question! What the heck are you supposed to say anyway)

I have no idea what this blog will hold. I just know that writing was an outlet for me and I miss it. I just want people to know that even if you go through the most horrific experience (maybe the one you most feared) you will get through it. God will get you through it and even though you may be bruised and scarred, you CAN get through it and be better.

I would like to say, I'm coming out or I'm back, but that's just weird. Instead, I'll end this blog by saying that it feels good to stop hiding and to release shame.

My name is Angie. I'm an ex-pastors wife, and these are my confessions.